I was working out in my room, barefoot the other night and I could not believe how far I have come in my journey with exercising. How I have never done “less,” but have never felt better. I walked into my bathroom and looked at my notebook from my daily devotional and I had written down; “God can do more, if we do less.”
In order for God to work in my life according to His will, I must do less! In order to experience the undeserving peace I so desire, I must do less. Less overanalyzing, less stressing, less controlling, less worrying, less of ME, more of HIM.
I have been blown away by this peace I’ve experienced since giving my life to Christ. I knew my life would change, but I never imagined just how much my outlook on myself would change.
I have never felt more (me) in my entire life.
For as long as I can truly remember I have been unhappy with my body and for years I tried desperately to change it in unhealthy ways.
I battled body dysmorphia, various disordered eating, over exercising, calorie counting, repeatedly going through phases of forced “self-love,” but not truly believing it…and so much more.
Why now? Why am I at such peace now? How can I work out less than I ever have, but feel better than I ever have? How can I be eating and fueling myself more generously than in the past and yet feel not one ounce of guilt? How am I am exhausted from toddler life and everything else, but my heart feels more energized than it ever has?
It’s because of God’s love.
It was there all along, I just had to access it. He has been knocking on my doors for years, all I had to do was open it. He loves me for exactly who I am, I am His child and He created me perfectly in His image and I have found this peace because I finally realize the power of His love.
I had to let go of the control over what I thought I should look like, what my life should look like, what happens next, etc. etc. etc. I spent so much time and wasted energy on things that were never in my control to begin with. Once I released that control, did less and let Him do more…things began to change.
Surrendering my life to Him allowed me to feel His peace, His Grace, His mercy. It’s taken a massive weight off of me and the need to be this that or the other and instead turn to him for…well everything. That burden wasn’t meant for us, he wants to carry that weight.
This peace would have never been achieved without Gods love at the center of my life.
Remember this, doing “less” doesn’t mean giving up, it doesn’t mean backing down or throwing in the towel, it means that you trust that God has a plan far greater than anything you could create on your own. It means releasing YOUR control, so HE can reveal what he wants to do through you.
Until Next Time on Kelsey’s Chronicles.